I'll never love anybody else
by smilegirl64
Summary: "How are you supposed to live without the one you loved the most?" He is gone and he won't come back. After one year Beca realises that this is not a nightmare, that she won't wake up next to him in the morning. There is no chance he is coming back, it's impossible. But like I always say: If you really believe in it, it can happen. Just don't lose hope.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey everybody out there!  
This is my first Pitch Perfect story, so please don't hate me if it sucks!**  
**It would be great if you if you left a review**** and told me what I could do better.  
Love y'all! 3**

**Disclaimer: Sadly i don't own this awesome movie!**

* * *

„_Stop it!" Beca shrieked while Jesse tickled her._

_"Why should I? I love how you giggle" he laughed und continued._

_He loved this girl so much. At first she seemed like she didn't care about anything, but that was what attracted him._

_She was a challenge, an adventure. And when he got to know her he discovered the real her._

_She could be nice and sweet and caring and of course the best girlfriend he could have dreamed of, but she still remained her sarcastic self. Another reason why he fell in love with her. She stayed herself, no matter what._

_She loved him just as much. Even when he was a dork sometimes and a complete nerd. He still annoyed her with his moviecation nights and his 'fun facts'. But in reality she loved all those things about him.  
_

_They were happy._

_Those were the good times…_

* * *

It has been a year, exactly one year, since he was gone.  
He left her, just like that.

It was now Beca's junior year in college and Christmas break was near, but she didn't care. She just sat here in her dorm and looked out the window. It was stormy outside. Branches and leaves spun around and the rain poured down.

She didn't go to her classes today. She knew she couldn't take that, not today. It was 3 pm and she had four major breakdowns so far.

She hated this, how he still had control over her, how vulnerable she was. But on the other hand it was just natural, she thought.

How are you supposed to live without the one you loved the most. You don't just go back to life like nothing happend, especially when they were ripped out of your life and you couldn't even say goodbye...

* * *

No one, except the Bellas, was allowed to see her. Her door was locked and only Fat Amy who had a key could or would open it. Either to come in herself or to let someone else in.  
That happened just that moment.

"Hey shawshank! How are you?" Amy asked as she entered the room.

"How do you think I am? I felt like shit when you left and I still do."

Fat Amy sighed and sat down beside her.

"I understand that this is hard for you, but you have to remember what he told you when you saw him for the last time. He said and I quote: "I want you to be happy. No matter what happens to me or to the people around you. This is your life, so promise me you'll live it."

It is actually really weird, like he knew what was going to happen…. But nevermind, the point is you are supposed to live and not sit in our dark room to watch the thunder.

Beca's face stayed emotionless as she listened to her friend, when Fat Amy had finished she looked at her and nodded slowly.

"You are right. I can't stay like this. I didn't do anything but sit around in our dorm for the past year. For the past few month I didn't even attend Bellas rehearsal! Oh my gosh, I am a mess!"

Amy smiled brightly by now. "Great! Now get up, go take a shower, get dressed and I see you in an hour for rehearsal.

Fat Amy left the room to inform the rest of the Bellas that the old Beca was on her way back.

Beca was determined to change. She didn't want to forget about him, she couldn't. But that didn't meant she couldn't live.  
And be serious for a moment: Who could forget about the love of their life which died just one year ago.


	2. Chapter 2

**What's up, buttercup?**  
**First of all I want to thank you for the follows and also for the one review, but please please please tell me what you think about this story cause I won't continue this if you don't like it!**

Disclaimer: Still don't own anything

* * *

"That was great! See you tomorrow bitches!" Fat Amy called out by the end of Bellas practice.

They had a few new members Jenny, Amanda and Liz, who were pretty good.

Everybody, besides Beca, Stacie, Cynthia, Fat Amy and Lily, left. Hey stayed because they wanted to talk. They finally convinced Beca to talk about the night when it happened. They thought it would help her because she was the only one who was there. Nobody else knows what happened exactly because Beca refused to tell them.  
She said it would be too painful.

"It's good to see you again" Stacie said as she put her water bottle down.

"It's good too be back" Beca smiled slightly.

They all grabbed a chair and sat down in a circle. A few minutes nobody said a word, than Beca spoke: "Okay I think I will just start now cause otherwise I won't do anything tonight."

* * *

_She could see the snow trickle down outside her window as she got ready for her date with Jesse. She was excited; it was their nine month anniversary. _

_She felt kind of stupid though, like she was one of those girls who can't decide what to wear for hours till they call their best friend for help. Because that was what she did! After one and a half hour she called Chloe to help her. _

_They argued 30 minutes about her outfit, because the first five outfits that Chloe suggested were either in her laundry or in Jesse's dorm and obviously she couldn't go there now._

So they decided on black skinny jeans and a blue shirt with her boots.

She got dressed quickly and did her make-up and hair.

_Just as she was finished there was a knock on the door.  
_

_She smiled brightly instantly and looked in the mirror for the last time before she walked to the door to open it._

Behind the door was an equally bright smiling Jesse holding a bouquet of flowers.

"Hey, you look beautiful." He greeted her and handed her the flowers.

"You don't look so bad yourself." She pulled him in for a kiss, but she pulled back before it could turn into something more, because she didn't want to ruin his plans for tonight.

_They walked outside holding hands to his car. He opened the door for her, than he walked around the car and got in himself. _

_The couple drove for about half an hour when Jesse pulled up to something that looked like a parking lot, but there was no building near and all the people were still in their cars.  
_

"_Where are we? What are we doing here?" Beca was confused._

"_Just wait and see." He smiled mischievous and got out of the car. He came back soon with a big bowl of popcorn and two drinks, that looked like coke. _

_She was about to ask again but was distracted by a big screen in front of them that lit up. _

_She recognised the movie that was played immediately! It was The Breakfast Club!_

_She looked over to Jesse stunned. The grin on his face just got wider. _

"_I talked to the owner and convinced him to play it tonight"_

_She was still speechless. Even after nine month he was able to surprise, even when she thought he had done every cheesy and romantic gesture that existed. _

_Since she couldn't say anything she put her hand to his neck and pulled him into a kiss, that was equally thankful, sweet and heated. _

_They didn't saw much of the movie and as the cars began to leave they came back to the real world._

_After the 'movie' Jesse took Beca to a restaurant for dinner._

_They talked for a while; nothing important just about the Bellas and the Trebles, College and about music in general._

_But as it had to happen he mentioned the topic she didn't wanted to talk about, at least not tonight._

"_You know that this job offer is a great chance for you Bec."_

"_I know it is, but it's so far away and I don't want to leave everything that I have here" She smiled at him and hoped he would drop it now. _

_Of course he didn't_

"_I'm just saying it always has been your dream to go to L.A. and produce music and now you could."_

_She sighed and put her fork down. "Why aren't you just happy about it? It seems like you want me to move to the other side of the country and get rid of me!"_

"_Of course I don't want that! But it doesn't make sense to me and I don't want you to regret you didn't accept the job in a few years!"_

"_Okay can we just go back to the campus? I have classes tomorrow." She didn't show any emotions, what meant her walls were back up, at least for now. _

_They drove back in silence and Jesse felt guiltier by the second. She was right, he should just be happy she wanted to stay with him instead of going to L.A. but he couldn't get the thought out of his mind that she actually wanted to go and only stayed because she thought she had to._

_So he made decision: He would work something out so she would go to L.A. _

_Even if he had to leave her._

_He pulled up to her building and she was about to get out of the car. _

"_Wait!" he said.  
_

"_I want to tell you something. You were right and it's your choice if you want to go. I'm sorry"_

_She just looked at him for a moment and he thought she would walk away without saying a word, but than she spoke._

"Thank you I appreciate this and I'm sorry too. I should understand that you want me to fulfil my dreams."

"_I just want you to remember that I want you to be happy. No matter what happens to me or to the people around you. This is your life, so promise me you'll live it."_

"I promise you."

_She didn't know why she said that, but she felt like she had to. _

_He kissed her good night and got in his car. She watched as he drove away and than turned to go inside as she heard a loud crash. _


	3. Chapter 3

**Here is the next chapter!  
I wanted to upload this today because it will take me a little to write the next one, because of school and all.  
Hope you like it, love y'all!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Pitch Perfect or any of the characters.**

* * *

_She ran onto the street and saw two cars that were practically folded into each other. She recognised Jesse's car immediately and started to run._

_Obviously she wasn't the only one who noticed the crash. When she got to the cars, people were already there one of them calling an ambulance._

_But she didn't care about them. All she cared about was her boyfriend in one of those cars._

_She ran up to his car and looked inside. _

_Jesse was in his seat unconscious. He had a cut on his forehead, but she didn't saw any other injuries._

_Oh my god! Oh my god! Oh my god! What am I supposed to do? He could die, he could have broken his skull or something._

_She was really freaking out._

_She had to make sure he was okay (well as much okay as it was possible at that moment) so she opened the car door and put her hands around his face._

"Jesse? Do you hear me?" She was nearly whispering. She searched for his heartbeat with her ear and it was still there but it sounded slower and weaker.

_She started to panic, she started to shake him but he didn't wake up. _

_She felt someone pulling her away. She tried to stay by his side but they were stronger._

_"Let go of me! I need to stay by his side! Let me go!" she was screaming and now she noticed she was crying._

_"Calm down miss! We are trying to help him!" the paramedic said who had pulled her away from Jesse._

_She saw how they lifted him out of the car and carried him to the ambulance._

_She moved to get in after him but a paramedic stopped her. "Only close family."_

_"I'm his wife." She said without hesitation.  
_

_She got inside the ambulance and held Jesse's hand the whole way to the hospital._

_When they got there everyone was in a hurry. They rolled him away and she tried to follow them but was stopped by a nurse._

_"I'm sorry sweetie but you can't go in there. I think he goes straight into surgery. Do you know anyone else we need to call?"_

_"His parents are on vacation in Europe. I don't know how to call them at the moment."_

_"It's okay. Just sit down here, I will tell you if there are any news."_

_So she sat down in one of those uncomfortable plastic chairs. She sat there for hours with her tears still streaming down her face but she didn't move. She didn't go to the bathroom or got something to drink._

_She was nearly falling asleep as a doctor approached her. "Are you Mrs Swanson?"_

_"Yes I am… kind of. How is he?"_

_"I'm so sorry. We did everything we could but it wasn't enough."_

_She felt how new tears started to form._

_"So… you mean… he is… dead?"_

_"I'm sorry."_

_It felt like all life that was left in her disappeared. It was gone just like him. Not until then she rally understood: He was gone._

_He would never hug her again, he would never kiss her again and he would never tell her that he loved her again._

_She would never see this grin of him again, she would never hear him sing again and she would never watch a movie with him again and hear his comments about it or see how he mouthed the words during the dialogues._

_She just broke down crying. It was too much to take._

* * *

Beca felt the tears streaming down her face all over again.

It was a lot to relive this whole situation so detailed again.

"Oh my god! I am so sorry Beca!" Amy exclaimed and stood up to hug her, soon all them were in a group hug.

And for the first time in a year Beca felt save and secure.


	4. Chapter 4

**Hello my friends!  
This is a short chapter but the nex tone will be longer, I promise.  
I hope you like it and please leave a review.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Pitch Perfect.**

* * *

Tree weeks had passed since Beca told her friends the story about the accident.

And she made a decision since then.

She would take that job offer and go to L.A.

Jesse wanted her to live her life and be happy and above all: make her dreams come true.

So she would fulfil his last wish and do what he told her to.  
She felt like she needed to do this.

She decided to tell the Bellas at today's practise.

"Hey nerds, I have to tell you something!"

"What's up shawshank?" Lily looked up like everybody else.

"This is kinda hard to tell you but I'm going to L.A.. I know you're glad that you just got me back but I feel like I need to do this. I can't stay here where everything reminds me of Jesse. I need to start fresh."

She looked at the girls and waited for their response but no one moved.

All of them stared at her with different expressions: anger, hurt, shock, sadness.

"We understand this. It's hard for you to be here. Just promise me you will think this whole moving thing over. If you're sure you want to go, we won't hold you back."

"Thanks guys! Now come here!"

They gathered around their leader in a giant group hug.

"Do you need help packing?" Stacie asked with a tender smile.

"That would be great." Beca was really happy now, her friends supported her decision and weren't mad about it.

* * *

It didn't took as long as Beca thought to pack all her things, convince her dad to let her drop out of college and find an apartment in L.A. that she could afford.

Eight days later she was in the parking lot with all the Bellas and her dad to say goodbye.

"We will miss you and you have to call or text us everyday if you can." Fat Amy said and Beca could swear she saw a tear in one of her eyes.

Her dad stepped forward. " Have a safe flight and call when you arrive." He pulled her into a quick hug.

"I'll miss you all too and of course I will call and text you."

She waved goodbye and got in her taxi that would drive her to the airport. A tear escaped her eye as she looked at all of them.  
This was her family, of course her dad was, but the girls were all like sisters to her and she was leaving them.

But she knew it was the right choice, she had to go.

With that thought she drove off to the airport and left her life at Barden behind.


	5. Chapter 5

**Aaaand here is the next chapter!**  
**Don't worry guys this story won't stay this sad. There is going to be more drama in the next ones.**  
**Love you all and don't forget to leave a review!  
**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Pitch Perfect (the probably best movie ever)**

* * *

Living in L.A. was pretty good.

Beca was there for two weeks and everything went perfect.

She was asleep through her whole flight.

Her apartment was small but very nice and she thought she might become friends with her neighbour. Michelle was only three years older than her and worked in a bar down the street. She was fun to be around.

Her job wasn't that great. She didn't actually have to produce music. She was kind of the assistant of the assistant.

And she had the feeling that her boss had no idea what he was doing. Sometimes she felt like she was surrounded by idiots.

All she had to do was getting coffee for everyone and make some calls.

But she just had to wait for a chance to show what she was capable of.

* * *

One of those horrible days was over and she got home.  
Her bag fell to the ground and she just kicked her shoes off into different directions.

She plopped down on her couch and grabbed her laptop. The DVD was inside already she just had to press play.

When she did the intro of The Breakfast Club started.

She sighed and watched the beginning.

That kind of became her thing. Every time she had a hard day or an argument with her boss or was upset about something else she watched The Breakfast Club.

When she did she calmed down immediately. It reminded her of Jesse and everything that did had that effect on her.

By now she knew the dialogues by heart. She even found herself mouthing the words along once.

Twenty minutes passed by when her phone started ringing. She paused the movie and got up. She smiled when she saw the caller ID, it was Jesse's mum. Beca and Jesse's parents were close since he died. Sure they got along before but now his mother felt like she needed to check on her every few months.

"Hey Carol!"

"Hello Beca. How are you doing?" Carol sounded happy today.

"I'm fine. How are you and John?"

"Oh we are fine too. How is your life at Barden?"

Oh right, they didn't know that she moved to L.A. yet.

"I totally forgot to tell you. I'm not at Barden anymore. I decided to move to L.A. and take that job offer I got over a year ago. It's unbelievable that they still wanted me. I mean I took a year to accept it."

"You are in L.A.?!" Carol sounded alarmed. Nearly panicked.

"Yeah I am. I came to the conclusion that I didn't belong to Barden anymore and it was kind of Jesse's last wish for me to take that job. So I dropped out two weeks ago and now I am here."

"Oh that's… great for you. Look honey I gotta go and call someone but I'll talk you soon." Now she sounded nervous.

"Ehm… alright. Bye Carol."

"Bye Beca"

And with that she hung up. Well that was strange. It seemed like she had problem with Beca living in L.A.

That was ridiculous. Since Beca knew her, Carol had supported her. Especially when it came to her future.

She walked back to her couch and sat down.

The rest of the day she thought about Carol and how she reacted to the news that Beca was living in L.A.

It was just weird and she couldn't get it out of her head.

* * *

At nine she got a text from Michelle.

"Do you want to come to the bar? It's karaoke night!"

Beca just grinned and typed: "I'm on my way."

Michelle didn't text her because she wanted her to sing karaoke. Beca didn't tell anyone in L.A. she even could sing.

Michelle just wanted to talk a little and make fun of the drunken people in the bar that embarrassed themselves because of their singing.

And Beca was perfectly fine with that.

Ten minutes later she arrived at the bar.

"There you are!" Michelle shouted from behind the counter as soon as she spotted her. "You are a little too late. Two minutes ago a guy left and let me tell you he was pure sugar. I'm sure you would have liked him!"

"It's okay. You know I don't need a guy." Truth is she didn't want one. No one could or ever would replace Jesse.

"So how is my favourite new neighbour doing?" Another thing Beca liked about Michelle was how fast she could open up too someone. They only knew each other for two weeks but they acted and talked like they had known each other since childhood.

"You know just the usual stuff. My boss is an idiot, my job is awfully boring and I'm waiting for my big chance to produce music myself."

"Sorry to interrupt this conversation but do you work for a record label?"

The guy who interrupted them was tall with blonde hair and really didn't look bad.

"Ehm… yes I do."

"Do you think you could get me an appointment with your boss? I'm managing a singer, who is really good but he needs a contract."

"I can try but it would be easier if you could give me some sound recording and at least your name."

"Of course, my name is Mike Scott and here is a song we recorded a few days ago." Mike handed Beca an USB-stick and his phone number.

"Okay I will call if there are any news. My name is Beca by the way."

"That's great thank you."

Beca turned back to Michelle who grinned at her. "Just the miracle we were waiting for."

"What do you mean?" Beca was confused.

"Don't you see it Beca? This is the chance you were waiting for! If this singer is good you might get a better job than getting coffee for your dumb boss!"


	6. Chapter 6

**Hel... Wait! Do I know you? Who are you?**  
**Well this is the next chapter of my story.  
Thanks for all the lovely comments and I'm sorry for any grammar or spelling misttakes. English is not my natiive language.  
Hope yoou like it. Love you!**

* * *

On Monday, right after she got to work, Beca walked to her boss' office.

She knocked politely and went inside.

Mr Tanner looked up from his newspaper.

"Ms Mitchell! What can I do for you?" He sounded surprised. To be true he had every right to do so. Since Beca worked here she saw him, let alone talked to him, maybe twice.

"Good morning Mr Tanner. I just wanted to give you this." She put the USB-stick down in front of him." A guy named Mike Scott gave it to me on Friday after he heard that I worked for a record label. This is a song he recorded with a singer who hasn't got a contract yet. Mr Scott said he was good. Could you please listen to it and tell me if we afterwards if you contract the singer?"

"I think I could do that. I know Mike Scott and he has a sixth sense when it comes to singers. If he said this one could sing than I'm pretty sure he can. I will call you later when I listened to that song."

"Thank you Mr Tanner."

"No problem. Now get out of my office I want to read the sport results!"

Well that was Mr Tanner. Sport was the most important thing to him. Sometimes she made jokes about how Mr Tanner would sell the label for the sports results.

She walked back to her desk and started doing some paperwork. Man she hated this job, it was so boring.

You think someone who works in the music business is cool right? Wrong! Most of her co-workers wore suits. Suits!

She didn't care, she still wore her clothes and she didn't care that everybody else was kind of staring at her when she walked through the halls.

* * *

She just wanted to leave for lunch when Mrs Meadow , Mr Tanner's secretary, ran up to her.

"Ms Mitchell! Ms Mitchell! Mr Tanner wants to see you. He said it was important, something about a Mr Scott."

"I'm on my way Mrs Meadow."

Like a few hours before Beca knocked on the door and just walked in without waiting for a "Come in".

To her surprise Mike was already there. He was sitting in on of the chairs in front of Mr Tanner's desk.

"Ah Ms Mitchell! It's good you're here. You know Mr Scott already."

"Yes I do. Glad to see you again Mr Scott. I presume this means we are going to contract the singer you were talking about?"

"Please call me Mike and yes. We just clarified the details. We are going to see each other a lot in the next months." Mike smiled at her but Beca didn't really noticed.

She was happy that this had worked out. Maybe her boss would give her a better job when they made much money because of this singer.

Her thoughts were interrupted by Mr Tanner. "Ms Mitchell I want you to help to produce the first album with… what was his name? It doesn't matter he should be here any minute. Well what I was trying to say is that you will help with the producing and if this works out well than maybe you will get to produce more often. "

Beca couldn't help the smile that broke out on her face. Michelle was right. This was her big chance, the chance to realize her dreams.

Then there was a knock on the door. The person didn't work here because he didn't come in instantly; he was polite and waited for a "Come in".

"Come in!" Mr Tanner shouted after a few moments. He wasn't used to do that.

Mike stood up. "There he is. Beca may I introduce you to your new… let's say co-worker for the next month."

Beca turned around and almost fainted. His eyes widened when he realized who was standing in front of him and so did hers.

She couldn't believe it. Right in front of her, healthy and alive, was standing no other than Jesse Swanson.


	7. Chapter 7

**Here it is! The chapter you were waiting for!  
I know the cliffhanger was mean but I like to do that so get used to it!  
As usual I hope you like it and please leave a review.  
Love you all sooo much!**

* * *

Beca didn't know what to do. That was impossible, it was just… that could not happen!

"I… this… you?!" Beca stuttered words without context. But then she whispered one word "Jesse".

Tears were forming in her eyes and she had the feeling her head was going to explode because she was torn whether she should jump into his arms and kiss him senseless or if she should kill him.

"I… I have to go."

She walked past him and right out of the door. She walked through the halls to her desk to grab her bag.

He wasn't dead. All the time that she had laid in her dorm crying he had lived his life like nothing happened. How could he?

"Beca wait!"

It was him. She didn't have to turn around to know it.

"Please let me explain."

She spun around, furious now.

"Explain? You want to explain? It's far too late for that! There is nothing left to explain! I thought you were dead for over a year when you were actually alive and kept living your life like nothing happened! How dare you doing this to me? Especially you should understand why this is the worst thing you could have possibly ever done to me! I lost my dad through the divorce, we didn't talked in years until Barden, my mom never was the same. I realized that I could trust nobody and you were the first one I let in. But you proofed my theory: I can not trust anyone! Everybody will find a way to leave me! And I was so stupid! I LOVED you!"

The tears were streaming down Beca's face. She saw the guilt in his eyes but she didn't care.

"And I thought you loved me. Obviously I was wrong." She whispered loud enough for him to hear and turned around to walk away.  
Before she turned around she saw something break inside of him. She saw he was truly hurt and felt guilty. But she was hurt too. How could he?

Everything went well and then he just decided to go. That was what hurt the most: He decided to do so!

Either she was paranoid or someone followed her because she heard steps that approached her quickly.

"Beca please! I'm really sorry! I can explain this if you only let me!"

She didn't want to hear his I'm-so-sorry-speech. She just wanted to be alone and punch something.. or someone.

"Leave me alone Jesse! I don't want to see you"

She stepped outside into the parking lot an searched my bag for my car keys. She was about to unlock her car, when..

"I did it for you."

That made her stand still like a statue. For her? He had too be kidding! How could he do something so horrible **for** her? This had to be a joke.

"You're kidding right? You made me go through hell! I just came here three weeks ago and two months ago I was still in my bed in my dorm at Barden crying over you like I did the whole past year! And now you come here and tell me you left me, you just walked away **for **me?! You're saying this like I asked you to do so!"

"No! No, that's not what I meant. It was the best for you, believe me. To leave you was the hardest decision I ever made but I had to do it. So please listen to me. I want to tell you the whole story."

He looked at her hopefully.

"I can't deal with all of this at once. Sadly I'll see you tomorrow Jesse."

She turned around, walked to her car and got in.

She put her forehead against the steering wheel and exhaled loudly.

This couldn't be happening; it had to be a dream.

She was sure by now that it was. Tomorrow she would come to work and there would be no Jesse.

Yeah right, like this was going to happen..


	8. Chapter 8

**I'm back Aca-bitches!****  
Hope you missed me, cause I sure missed you!  
So here is the next chapter. I think it's not that great but please leave a review anyway!****  
Love youuu!**

* * *

Beca drove around the city for a while.

She was confused and angry and sad and happy. Wait! Happy? No she wasn't happy! Why would she be happy? She had no reason to be!

Okay yes, Jesse was alive but that wasn't the most important thing at the moment.

When she got home and her door was locked she let herself cry again. She crawled into her bed and cried nearly the whole night. At 5am she fell asleep.

How was she supposed to deal with this? She was going to work with him for the next three or four month. And she had to be professional. She couldn't screw this up, this was her big chance! If she talked to Mr Tanner now and said she couldn't do it he would not let her do anything for a very long time, maybe never.

_You can do this Beca!_ She told herself. _You will make it through this and you will make a good job. You waited too long to mess this up! You deserve this!_

* * *

She woke up at 7am.

_Beca get up! You don't want to be late for your first day in your personal hell, do_ you_?_ Wow, even her mind could be sarcstic.

Beca got up and walked straight into the bathroom and got in the shower.

While the water dabbled down on her she thought of a plan. A plan on how she could survive the next three month without having breakdowns every time she saw her client (that's what she decided to call **him**) longer than two minutes.

Maybe it was the best to tell him she didn't want to talk about it. She just wanted to make that album and send him on his way afterwards.

Yes, that was what she was going to do. She would talk to him first thing when she got to work and get this straight.

As she got out of the shower she noticed that she was already late so she ran in her bedroom and just threw something on. On her way to the door she grabbed her cell phone, wallet and keys and stuffed them into her bag, in which, she prayed, was everything else she needed today for work.

* * *

She was almost there when her phone started ringing. Unknown Caller.

_It could be mike or someone else from work. _

She picked up her phone.

"Hello?"

"Where are you? We should have started working on the first song twenty minutes ago!" The voice sounded angry, but Beca couldn't relate it to somebody she knew.

"Sorry, who is this?"

"It's Freddy. You know the guy who always sits at the sound control?"

"Oh yeah alright. I'm on my way. In fact I will be there in a minute."

"Good. You are lucky Tanner didn't come round yet. You know he would give tis project to someone else immediately."

"Yeah I know." Don't worry I'll be there soon. And if he comes when I'm not there yet, tell him I'm getting coffee for us."

"Alright. See you in a few."

I clicked the end button and focused on the road.

What would I do without Freddy? In fact that was the third time he saved my ass. Well kind of. He didn't really save my ass; he just covered up for me. And I was really thankful for that. He could become a friend of mine.

I drove into the parking lot and jumped out of my car.

When I got to the studio Freddy, Mike, and Jesse were all sitting in chairs and chatted. They looked like they were getting along pretty well.

"Sorry guys, I overslept! My alarm clock wasn't working."

Okay that was a lie. But what was she supposed to say? Sorry, I fell asleep at 5 am because I couldn't stop crying and thinking over my ex-boyfriend who is in this room as well.

Just as she finished the thought she realized something. Was Jesse even really her ex-boyfriend. They never really broke up. So what were they?

She reminded herself to put that on the list of things she needed to sort out before she talked to Jesse. Obviously she couldn't do it now, like she actually planed to, cause they were already late and not on schedule anymore.

"Finally!" Freddy sighed in relief and turned to his equipment.

"Okay than let's get started." Mike said while standing up.

Jesse didn't look at Beca, at least not directly in the eye. He just nodded in response to Mike's announcement.

Beca was surprised. Maybe, just maybe, this wouldn't be as hard as she thought. If he acted like she wasn't in the room and didn't talk to her. It was for the best.

… How could he dare not talking to her? How could he still act like nothing happened? Oh great, now she wanted his attention or what?


	9. Chapter 9

**Sorry for the long wait, but I had some writing issues.  
Anyway here is the next chapter, I hope you like it and please leave a review.  
****Love you!**

* * *

Beca couldn't really concentrate through the recording session.

She caught herself thinking about Jesse constantly.

Why did she do that? She should be angry at him. She should glare at him all day. Instead she sat there dreaming about him.

After three hours of working or whatever Beca was doing, she said that she needed a break.

The guys left to grab lunch while Beca stayed behind. She put her headphones on and let the music carry her away. Somewhere she didn't need to think about the whole Jesse thing. She could just listen and do nothing.

* * *

She nearly fell out of her seat when she felt a tap on her shoulder. Her eyes shot open only to see a grinning Jesse standing in front of her.

"Oh my gosh! You scared the hell out of me! What do you want?" She was still trying to catc her breath.

"A) I wanted to scare you a little. Mission accomplished!

And B) I wanted to talk to you." Suddenly he sounded shy and coy. "You know, about this thing."

"I still don't see what's left there to talk about. But I know you won't give up so okay, go ahead."

He sat down in the chair beside her and sighed deeply.

"Okay first of all I want you to listen to the entire story and don't interrupt me. In the end it will all make sense." He looked at her expectant.

She thought about it for a second but she gave in.  
"I doubt that but fine."

"Thanks. So it all starts two years ago. It was nearly our anniversary, when you told me about this job offer you got. It was in LA, it was all you ever dreamed of. But I knew you wouldn't go, although you wanted to.

And I couldn't shake the feeling that I was the reason why you stayed. So I started to try to convince you to go but you wouldn't listen.

And then, a few days before our date I got the crazy idea that if I wouldn't be there, nothing would hold you back. But I dropped that thought, because I knew I could not just disappear. Well so I thought.

You were there when I had the car accident and it must have been the shock or I was still too dizzy but when I woke up in the hospital I saw the chance, the chance to set you free, to leave you without breaking up with you. Because we both know I never could have done that.

So I told the doctor to tell you that I died. I told him it was for the best of you and I don't know why but he did it.

After you left I called my parents to tell them I was in hospital and that they should play along if you called them. Everything else would be explained later. They agreed too. It was so unreal; I mean it wouldn't have worked out if one of them didn't play along.

Anyway, at that moment I really thought I would do you a favour. I didn't realise how much I hurt you because I didn't really saw the one bad thing: You thought I was dead.  
I didn't realised it, I didn't until my mom told me.

She promised me to stay in touch with you so I had a way to see if you are alright. Well it turned out you weren't.

She told me how done you were with life and I would have done everything, please believe me everything to make you feel better, but there was nothing I could do.

I chose the path and I couldn't just go back. I mean you would have freaked out if I had walked into your dorm and told you everything was fine. You probably would have had a mental breakdown or something.

So there I was, I couldn't change the things that I've done, I had to live with them. And I regret doing this since day one.

Even before I heard how broken you were, because I just couldn't live without you."

When he finally came to an end Beca didn't know what to say. She just sat there, her mouth slightly opened and thought about Jesse, how he rambled on and on about how sorry he was.

"I…I really don't know what to say." Beca was still processing all that she heard.

"It's okay. You have time to think about this. As you know I'm around for the next days or so."

He chuckled a little while he said the last words.

"Yeah... ehm. Could you… could you tell the others that I went home. You can still record today. Freddy knows what to do. I'll… see you tomorrow."

Beca walked out of the room still confused about this situation she was put in. She had to find out if she could keep hating Jesse or if she could forgive him and that was harder than deciding to come to LA.


	10. Chapter 10

**Here I am again!  
I am sorry for the long wait but I had a lot going on in my life and didn't have time to write and I wasn't in the mood either.  
I hope you still like me and the story ****and that you will keep reading it.  
Love y'all!**

* * *

What do you do in a situation like this? What do you say? What do you think? How much time do you have until it's too late? What is he expecting? How do we work together if I tell him no and he hates me? Can I even tell him no? Or yes? What are my feelings for him?

All of those questions were running through Beca's head and she didn't know the answer to one of them.

She was in her apartment, sitting on her couch with a cup of tea in her hand. The tea was already cold. She has been sitting there like this for about two hours and didn't move.

_Come on Beca! Get a grip of yourself, this aren't you! You never were the one to sit and think about a guy all day!_

_But this isn't jus a guy we are talking about, it's Jesse._

Her thoughts were interrupted when someone knocked on her door. She slowly stood up and walked over to the door. On the other side was Michelle.

"Hey there." She greeted Beca warmly. "Can I come in?"

"Sure." Beca stepped aside to let her friend in. "So do you want anything in particular?"

"Not really. We just haven't spoken in a while and when I stopped by your work one hour ago they told me you were already home. What happened?" Michelle was looking at her with a serious and worried expression at the same time.

"What do you mean? Nothing happened."

"Oh come on! We both know that you never leave work early. Remember the cold you had the first week you got here? You were constantly coughing and felt like shit for three days and went to work anyway."

"Okay stop you are being creepy with everything you know about me. I just don't want to put all my problems on you. I never was one of the girls who told everyone else their issues."

"I understand and respect that but you can't keep it all to yourself. After a while it will eat you from the inside and if it gets too much it will break you."

"Aaand there is the creepiness again."

Both girls started to laugh hearty and sat down on Beca's couch.

As their laughter died down Beca became serious again.

"If I tell you, you have to promise me to not tell anyone."

"Of course I wouldn't. I would not betray you like that." Michelle gave an assuring smile.

"Well alright then. Jesse is back. He was my boyfriend at university. And he seems to want me back but I don't know what to do. I'm just so confused!"

Michelle looked a little puzzled. "What's there to be confused about? Either you still have feelings for him or you don't. I mean it depends on how you broke you. Did you broke up with him or did he ended it?"

"Well….. no one really ended it. Look this might sound strange but he kind of pretended he was dead so I would take the job offer and come here to LA."

"What? No way! What kind of person does that? Wait a sec! Is he the guy you once told me about, this dead boyfriend that you cried over for months?"

"Yes." Beca said shyly. She was a little intimidated from Michelle's outburst.

"Oh my gosh I can't believe it! This is like one of those romance movies! But anyway, you have to decide what to do. I mean, do still have feelings for him? Are you willing to forgive him?

That was the basic question. She knew that, deep down; she still had feelings for Jesse. But could she also forgive him for letting her live in her personal hell for months? That was what she needed to think about…


	11. Chapter 11

One week ago Beca talked to Michelle. The last seven days she spent thinking deeply about her and Jesse. And although she was supposed to work with him, she had barely seen him all week.

Even after one whole week she wasn't sure what to do. She was sure she still had feelings for Jesse, but she wasn't sure if she could be with him (if that made any sense), if he even still wanted to be with her.

They hadn't really talked since he told her he wanted to try again. During recording sessions or meetings she had tried to be as professional as possible and always was with someone so he couldn't take the opportunity to talk to her about, well, them.

She had absolutely avoided him, but only because it was for the best. She needed time to think alone. It has always been that way. She needed time alone to listen to her heart and do the right thing. She couldn't concentrate if someone constantly asked her what her decision would be.

About her feelings: She still loved him. That was a fact.

Though her love for him wasn't as strong as it has been, it was there.  
Now she needed to tell him. The easiest way was to walk up to him and tell him but she wasn't sure if she could do that.  
She wasn't sure of anything at all.

On Monday she sat at her desk at work planning the week with Freddy. Mike said that the first songs should be finished as soon as possible so they could start advertising the album.

"How about we finish the song we are working on at the moment tomorrow and do next two on Thursday and Friday?" Beca suggested.

"No we can't work on Friday."

"Why not? I thought Mike wanted to finish these first songs so they have enough to start advertisings. Oh my god, don't tell me Jesse wanted a day off! He can't do this! We can't afford to not record for a whole day!" That was so frustrating. Jesse couldn't just take a day off because he wanted to. They would fall behind and wouldn't finish work on time. And take a guess who would get the problems with their boss, that's right Beca would.

"Whoa whoa calm down! It's not like Jesse wants to take a day off. He has to fly to New York for a few interviews and stuff." Freddy was obviously surprised by Beca's sudden outburst.

"Oh okay, ehm…that's fine… I guess." Beca scratched the back of her head awkwardly.

Freddy just decided to act like nothing happened. "Well anyway, Mike told me he wanted the songs finished on Thursday because they don't know how long they will be in New York."

"Than we have to start the second song on tomorrow as well and we have to work on Wednesday."

Everything went according to plan. On Thursday they finished the last song. Jesse went to his apartment almost instantly. Mike stayed behind.

Beca grabbed her bag. "So I will go now. It's pretty late. You are coming here tomorrow before your flight, right?"

"I will walk out with you. I should go home now too. And yes I have some last things to discuss with your boss."

It was silent for a few minutes while they walked down the corridor.

When they walked into the parking lot, Beca walked to her car and opened the door. She turned around to say bye to mike when all of a sudden she felt a pair of lips pressed against hers.  
She was sso surprised that she needed a moment to pull away.  
Mike looked at her with an expectant look on his face.

"I… I have to go now."

Beca just turned around and got in her car and drove away.

* * *

I'm really sorry, but ui hab no idea how to continue  
This story will be over soon but I couldn't just leave it like this because I hate it when other authors don't finish stories.  
So you will get your ending, don't worry

xoxo smilegirl64


	12. Chapter 12

**I'm sorry that this chapter is so short but it's just a filler. The next chapter will be the last.  
hope you like it!  
xoxo Smilegirl**

Beca was shocked to say the least.

Luckily she could stay in bed longer, because Jesse and Mike were leaving today so she didn't have any work to do.

Why did Mike kiss her?! Did he think that she liked him? It didn't even matter. He was flying across the country with Jesse in a couple of hours. She didn't have to worry about it. They were coming back in a two month probably and till then this would be forgotten.

Around noon she was sitting at her desk at work and went through some papers when Freddy walked up to her.

"Hey! Do you have everything ready?"

"Erm… ready for what exactly?"

"Don't you know? I thought Mike told you last night before you both left."

Beca cringed inwardly at the memory of last night.

"Beca, Jesse and Mike won't come back, at least not in two month. They even think about staying in New York, maybe forever."

Whaaaaaaat?!  
I waited for an explanation.

Oh I didn't say that out loud, did I? Okay second try.

"Whaaaaaaat?!"

Freddy stumbled backwards at my sudden outburst.

"Yeah, Mike told me almost a week ago. I'm surprised you didn't know."

My mind went into a frenzy. This couldn't be happening. He couldn't just leave, not after what happened.

"Do you know where they are now? When does their flight take off?"

"Erm.. they are already at the airport I think and their flight" Freddy looked at his watch "takes off in 45 minutes." He looked me right in the eyes and said: "Run Beca, I know you don't want to lose him now and you deserve to be happy. Don't let him get away."

I smile brightly and kiss Freddy on the cheek. "Thank you." And then I run, down the halls and out of the building straight to my car.

It's a challenge to drive to the airport in 45 minutes but I will make it, I have to make it. Because otherwise the love of my life will get on a plane and fly across the country to stay there for god knows how long.


End file.
